Thursday, November 6, 2008

Riddle me this!

Over at The Collective, the ladies have been filling out a little questionnaire all week, and it's been pretty entertaining. With that in mind, I've ripped off the questionnaire and will now fill it out myself. Just 'cause it seems like it'll be fun. Here we go!

1. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?

Osama bin Laden. Seriously. 9/11? Not cool, man.

2. You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Who will it be?

Creed.

3. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?

Bill O'Reilly.

4. What is your favorite cheese?

Cheddar. Or nacho, with nachos. Yum.

5. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your immediate disposal. What kind of sandwich will you eat?

Bootlegger Club from Jimmy John's.

6. You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice?

Scarlett Johansson. If it were TV celebrity, this would be a much more difficult decision.

7. You have the opportunity to sleep with the music celebrity of your choice, who will it be?

Jenny Lewis.

8. Now that you've slept with two people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. What do you buy?

Comic books!

9. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

New Zealand.

10. An angel appears out of heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the beverage of your choice. It is?

Barq's Red Cream Soda.

11. Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anywhere in the PAST. Where do you go?

1938. I would buy a copy of Action Comics #1. And then I would leave.

12. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?

There will be no class divisions. That's right. My beautiful island will be a socialist paradise.

13. You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it?

A new season of Sports Night.

14. What is your favorite curse word?

Shit.

15. One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren't really doing anything, what do you do?

Call a museum and offer to sell them the mummies for a tidy profit. Or set them on fire. Which would surely lead to...

16. Your house is on fire! What do you do?

Grab my sketch book and run like a little girl. And then cry because a) my comic books and toys were in there, and b) I still don't have renter's insurance because I am an idiot.

17. The Angel of Death has descended upon you. Fortunately, the Angel of Death is pretty cool and in a good mood, and it offers you a half-hour to do whatever you want before you bite it. Whatcha gonna do in that half-hour?

Scarlett Johannson and Jenny Lewis at the same time.

18. You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and whats even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What super-power is it?

Flight.

A question about the question, though: if I ate radioactive vegetables, wouldn't I end up with vegetable powers? I mean, Spider-Man was bitten by a radioactive spider and he got spider powers, so it stands to reason, right? Maybe not.

19. You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

How about the half-hour that I spent doing Scarlett Johannson and Jenny Lewis at the same time?

20. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

9/11. I mean it, Osama. Not. Cool.

21. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check this out you can move anywhere. Where are you going?

New Zealand. It's like Lord of the Rings!

22. This question still counts, even for those of you who are under age, if you were banned from every bar in the world except one, which one would it be?

The Trolley Stop. I really like the patio out back.

23. Hopefully you didn't mention this in the super-powers question... If you did, then we'll just expound on that. Check it out… Suddenly, you have gained the ability to fly! Whose house are you going to fly to first, and be like "Check it out I can FLY!?"

Jennie's house. I would land on her balcony like Superman. And then we would fly around. Like Superman and Lois Lane. I know, it's adorable, isn't it?

24. The constant absorption of magical moon beams mixed with the radioactive vegetables you consumed earlier has given you the ability to resurrect the dead famous person of your choice. So which celebrity will you bring back to life?

Heath Ledger. And no, I don't think it's too soon at all.

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