The third most famous plumber in the world.

I'm thinking of becoming a plumber. I know, I know. It's a fad. Last week I was thinking about drinking a six-pack every day. It will all be over soon, I hope, and I can get back to my life. For now, though, the political candidates just won't leave me alone.

By now we all know about Joe the plumber. I've been hearing this all day. A friend of mine pointed out the inordinate number of Joes involved in the presidential campaigns this year - Joe Biden, Joe Six-Pack, Joe the plumber, and Joe Mama, to name a few. Well this morning I googled "Joe the plumber". And it turns out there are a lot of plumbers named Joe. And several have websites. So this is a free plug for them. If you need a plumber, call Joe. Joe the plumber.

Just be sure not to call the real Joe the plumber. The one that John McCain mentioned 900 times last night. That guy doesn't even have a license to be a plumber. He just does it all willy-nilly, like nobody cares. Well somebody cares, Joe the plumber. The state of Ohio cares. They've got a website for it and everything. You can even find out how to get licensed by going to that website. It's crazy about this new technology, isn't it? I know, man. I know. Y'know, I lived in Bowling Green for a few years. Bowling Green, which is just a hipshake south of Holland, where you live. Heck, maybe you even came and worked on my toilet once and I didn't know it. And I appreciate that. But I would also appreciate you GETTING YOUR PLUMBER'S LICENSE AND NOT SCREWING UP MY BATHTUB INSTALLATION BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT LICENSED AND DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING. Could you do that? Thanks.

On a related note, how great would it be if John McCain inadvertently put the place where Joe the plumber works out of business by drawing attention to the fact that they're operating without proper licenses? Nice work, John. Think before you speak.

(By the way, the two plumbers that are more famous than Joe the plumber? Two brothers named Mario and Luigi. Look them up. They're huge.)